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Archive for the ‘Loss of Daughter’ Category

Tara received her new heart while in her 20’s only to enjoy life for another 2 years before a local man decided to drive while drunk. We all make mistakes, unfortunately this was his second offense with a blood alcohol content (BAC)of .18 and after only 59 months of incarceration was walking our streets again. In addition to this tragedy, Tara’s stepsister and half-sister were also killed by him and the families are still without an apology, remorse for his actions or acknowledgement. These beautiful girls should still be physically with us.

After speaking with Tara’s mother Cathy for over 2 hours, I realized  most people would have gravitated towards her. Tara was the girl next door, full of life, talked to anyone, was selfless, was giving and had a soul stronger than her heart.

Tara’s story has many chapters, one being her heart condition. Tara had endured several surgeries, but was in need of a stronger heart. She would lay in a hospital bed for 12 weeks before receiving a donor heart. Tara was ecstatic but in a split second was melancholy due to the realization someone had died. She often thought of others first and needed to pray for the family, later to befriend the mother, Mildred.

The transplant was a success. There is always a chance something could go wrong, but Tara had strong faith which her mother Cathy did not at the time. They openly discussed this fear later on and Cathy decided to turn to God for comfort as her daughter did and was saved. Tara’s heart transplant changed Cathy’s life forever. This event gently prepared Cathy for what was to come in the future.

Another heart warming chapter of Tara’s life would be her son Jagger. Tara married Sean in 2000 and because of her heart condition, could not have children. This did not stop Tara from being a mother. The couple was involved in an open adoption and cared for their newborn baby boy for 9 weeks before Tara’s death.

Jagger will never know how wonderful his mommy was, how she would spoil him, how she would fix his boo boo’s or just being able to snuggle at night during a storm.

Cathy has another daughter Katie, who is 24 years younger than Tara. Katie just adored her big sister and her new nephew.

Jagger is now 6 and lives out-of-state with his new family. Even though adopted, the family agrees Jagger has many features of Tara.

Cathy had tremendous support after the death of her daughter, one being her girlfriend, Denise.

Denise was with Cathy during the difficult times including the civil trial. On Tara’s birthday, mothers day and day of the accident, Cathy receives a phone call, card or some kind of gift assuring Cathy her daughter will never be forgotten.

Marty, an associate preacher of Pleasant Garden Baptist Church would also be of tremendous comfort for Cathy. This holy man did not know Tara, but gladly opened his door and his heart to Cathy’s grief.

Cathy now speaks on behalf of her daughter and MADD (Mother Against Drunk Drivers) at the Guilford County Courthouse and has received additional support from this organization. Cathy also mentions Michael Jackson, founder of Crash Prevention Network of North Carolina supporting families touched by vehicular accidents/crimes.

Cathy did not have the opportunity to say goodbye or hold Tara because of her condition after the limo fire and explosion. Cathy does cradle her ashes when she feels close to Tara.

Thank you for sharing Tara’s story, your healing resources and support systems with the community.

Peace Love and Hugs

Diana

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