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Angelversary n. 1. is a word created by a bereaved parent denoting the annual date of a baby’s death, either early in pregnancy, stillbirth, or shortly after. This day is just as important to a bereaved parent as a birthday, and many are marking both birth and death on the same day. While “anniversary” might work, that often seems too celebratory a word for this kind of day. Angelversary is our answer to describing the most difficult day during the year.

 These are suggestions and ideas for Angelversary days.

Release balloons or butterflies

 ♥ In-name-of Gift -You can buy a star named after your child or give a financial contribution to a deserving charity

Visit child’s resting place – You can spend this day visiting your child’s gravesite, memory garden, site where you spread your child’s ashes, or any number of places that hold special meaning to your family and remind you of your child

Take baby someplace new – We believe your baby is with you in some spiritual way.  If you too believe this, you may like the idea of taking your baby someplace new each angelversary.  You can take pictures at that location and compose a scrapbook of all the places you visited in honor of your special angel baby

Send a letter to family and friends – Sharing the memory of your child can be especially important and healing.  One way to do this is to send a letter to your family and friends with special memories and thoughts you have of/for your child

 ♥ Adopt a pet – Pets are great healers and need your love. Perhaps now is the day you want to choose an addition to your family

 ♥ Living object – You can plant something in honor of your beloved child.  The choices of what to plant are quite plentiful and if you don’t have space at home you can plant in a community garden, pot or memorial garden.

 by Basil Augusta

Some information provided by www.alovingjourney.org and www.kotapress.com

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Mothers Day is typically a joyous time where mothers are treated like queens by their children. What happens on this day when the children are deceased?

Mothers Day is different for some families.

What could have been, is not.

There are numerous books regarding pregnancy and infant loss from all perspectives. Unfortunately, most people reading them are only those directly affected. If others took some time to look over these resources, when or if a tragic event occurs, they may be the shoulder of comfort for the bereaved parents.

Definition of a mother: a female person, whose egg unites with a sperm, resulting in the conception of a child. Mothers Day is arduous for women who have lost their babies due to society’s view for a day of happiness and appreciation. Many women forego church due to the sadness of not having their child present and unsure whether to stand while being recognized by members. Mothers long for acknowledgement, even if in private.

Tracey Holyfield, founder of Heartstrings, suggests sending a thinking of you email, card, or phone call, recognizing her and her baby. Making donations to Heartstrings, Haven of Hope and Healing or March of Dimes in the child’s memory is another kind gesture.

Tracey purchased stackable rings for her deceased twins and other living children on her first mother’s day. Surviving the first year is twice as difficult because while mothers are grieving, communicating needs to family and friends is also necessary and exhausting.

It is a testimony of love by the numbers of families attending yearly pregnancy and infant loss events each year to remember the babies who briefly stayed.

Bereaved parents are able to compose a quilt square in remembrance of their children.

Some bereaved families will plan the day and exchange ideas with a spouse beforehand. This process may alleviate tension on an emotional day where feelings are easily hurt. Even if living children are present, the family is incomplete and mourning the baby.

Please think about all Mothers on Mothers Day

Peace Love and Hugs

Diana

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